Mornings in Our House

Worth getting up for in the morning, bed head and all! My favorite people in the whole world!

Say cheese! (She said it, and then promptly demanded some from the fridge.)

Catching Up

So I survived another week at work. It was another roller coaster, starting off really tough and ending just fine. By the time Friday rolled around, I could barely remember what we'd done at the beginning of the week. Once the days start rolling, I have to jump on the train and just keep going until Friday afternoon brings it all to a glorious, screeching halt and I get to put my feet on solid ground for a few hours.

Besides the daily slog, here are some tidbits from around these parts.

I picked up (well, downloaded) and breezed through my first just-for-fun-not-related-to-work book in a long time, Shutter Island. It was excellent. The movie previews made it look uber-scary, not exactly my cup of tea, but the book was actually more suspenseful than give-me-nightmares (a good thing too, since the only chance I get to read these days is in bed before I pass out). It felt really nice to get a mental break and dive into another world, far from the stress of behavior plans and curriculum. I've missed my me time! So yay for that. This book is for next month's book club, so I will eventually be watching the movie version, and here's hoping it isn't too scary (knowing the plot in advance will hopefully help). But if you're into the twist ending, I definitely suggest this book.

I'm seriously contemplating painting a small strip of wall in the kitchen with chalkboard paint. I already tweeted/facebooked about it, and the reviews from pals has been mixed. Some people love the idea (so fun!) and some people hate it (so messy!) But I think I'm leaning towards going for it. It's not so much for Violet as it is for me - just a place to write notes or reminders. Of course, she can draw on it too. To help me decide, I rigged up some black paper to see how it looks. Care to weigh in? I'm mostly worried that the shock of black in our mostly-white kitchen will be too jarring. And if I hate it, repainting will be a beyotch. So I want to be 100 percent before I go for it.

Commit?

Let's see, what else? We finally ordered a new bed frame - our first real bed! I really want to make our master bedroom look nice. We painted it, now we're starting on furniture, hopefully soon it will be a calm, relaxing retreat instead of a hodgepodge of giveaway furniture and random textiles. It's about time to start living like a grown up and not a college student. Pictures to come, once the bed gets delivered.

Lately Violet has been waking us up before the alarm. And my alarm goes off early. For the record, we do not approve, but Matt has been making the best of it, hauling our Noodlehead out of bed for some a.m. Elmo and songs while I finish getting ready. Here's hoping this is one habit that gets broken before it forms.

Matt got a round of applause after his morning rendition of the ABC Song.

Bears, Oh My!

Before Violet was born, some sweet people Matt works with gave us a gift card to spend on some new clothes. We finally cashed it in...

Matt picked out a new pair of slippers for Violet. Look closely - they're bears! And we all know that bears say "rawr!"

We weren't sure if she was going to like them...

But it turns out, she does!

Building Blocks

My little block head! Earlier I was telling you how we had such a great weekend, and it was something I really needed. The first full week back at work was overwhelming and I was really missing my little girl. But on Saturday, I gave myself permission to focus fully on Violet and my family (save a few organizational things I did during naptime). It was wonderful. Us girls spent the morning together going shopping and playing in a fountain. Once we got home and Violet woke up from her nap, she was so happy and sweet. I don't know if daycare is really fostering her independence or she's just growing up, but she played so well by herself while Matt and I stayed busy on various projects.

At one point, Matt actually looked up from what he was doing and asked if I'd seen Violet. She was so busy and quiet that we'd both lost track of her! Well, I snooped around and found her playing on her own (!) in the playroom (!) where she'd managed to find her blocks (!), pull them out of the bin by herself (!) and was contentedly stacking them ten-high (!) and knocking them down over and over (!). (Note how many of those things totally stunned me!)

This summer I was continually frustrated that Violet seemed to need me right next to her in order to play happily. I felt like I couldn't get anything done! But Saturday was a revelation. It was amazing to watch her figuring out what to do and accomplishing her goal. And the best part was, she was so happy! (Can you tell I've been dealing with some working-mommy guilt about having to "abandon" her at daycare and seeing her miserable each afternoon when I pick her up?)

We ended our Saturday by dropping Violet off at daycare's Parents' Night Out and spending some quality husband-wife time. We did a little browsing for a new bed, bought Violet a bunch of new shirts (she's growing so fast that her 18-mo stuff doesn't cover her tummy!) and had a fun dinner, capped off by a last-minute run to Wal-mart (because nothing says date night like a trip to Wal-mart!) so I could make a return. It was nice to have some time with Matt that occurred before 8:30 p.m. when I'm usually so tired or already focused on what needs to get done the next day. We're going to try to commit to signing up for every month's Parents' Night Out so we can get in at least one date night. (Once upon a time I actually thought we'd get a weekly date night - ha!)

All in all, it did my soul well to have this little oasis of calm in the middle of what is proving to be a whirlwind start to the school year. I'm hoping every weekend can be like this!

Girls' Day Out

On Saturday Violet and I made a mid-morning run to The Forum to pick up a few dinner items at Trader Joe's. Well, Violet was being so good that we were also able to make a stop at Old Navy and the Loft, where I was able to take my time in the dressing room (previously unheard of!) and scored a couple new tops for both of us. And it being such a warm, sunny day, we just had to stop at the water fountain to cool off a little!

An Extra Hour

On Monday, Matt noticed Violet had some weird red splotches on her chest and back. On Tuesday, daycare noticed it. So finally on Wednesday, I conceded that perhaps I should get Violet checked out just in case it turned out to be something serious. I know, mom of the year, right? Well, I've been a little preoccupied with my new job. Maybe I've told you about it? (And by preoccupied, I mean that my sign-in sheet for Tuesday read 7:20 a.m. - 7 p.m. Good times.)

Finally on Wednesday, I decided to make Violet a doctor's appointment to get the splotches looked at. I even called daycare in the middle of the day to get confirmation that yes, the rash was still there. Fair enough, I made the latest appointment I could get, threw everything in my bag to take home, abandoned my team in the middle of our collaborative planning session, raced to daycare, swooped in to pick Violet up and...

No rash.

In the words of Charlie Brown, ARGH! So Violet and I just went home instead. All the way in the car I was seething, worrying about the planning time I was missing, worrying about all the undone things at school, worrying about getting it all done in the mere 30 minutes I get in the morning before the kids come tramping in.

But then, I realized that Rashgate 2011 was a little gift to be savored, like a surprisingly sunny day in the midst of a bitter winter. Violet and I played outside, shared a snack, hung out like the good old days before this thing called first grade took over my life. I forced work out of my mind and focused fully on my sweet little girl, who is getting so big and tall I scarcely know who she is some days. We laughed, we played, and I didn't think about work again until she was tucked upstairs in bed. I think we both needed those stolen hours to reconnect. Normally I don't leave school until five, and by then we only have three hours together before Violet is passed out asleep. Three measly hours is not enough time with my sweet baby girl. I miss her. I don't think I've been able to truly relax and enjoy her (or life in general) since school started. Most of my waking moments are spent thinking about school, and it is exhausting, carrying that burden. I'm hoping it gets easier (although every day I seem to find something that makes it heavier). But I am so thankful for the rash-that-wasn't and the extra time it gave me with sweet Violet this week.

Happy Friday!

Violet, waiting for a spoonful of ice cream to get just a little.bit.closer.

How'd They Do That?

I did so much Sesame Street watching this summer, I became more and more fascinated by how they make it work. The puppets are amazing! And the real actors, kids and celebrities that are in the scenes seem to totally buy into the fact that they are conversing with a lovable creature, and not actually two guys hiding under a furry blanket. It's really something... Anyway, I dug up some behind-the-scenes footage in case anyone is as interested as I am. Enjoy! (Or be totally creeped out - your choice!)

Random Picture Upload

Here are a few random pictures I've been meaning to share with you all (just in case you were worried this blog was becoming all about school and none about Violet):

Dinner at Pup-Pop (Grandpa) and Pub-Pop (Grandma)'s house. At least, I think that's what Violet calls them! It's hard to tell sometimes... Doesn't matter, they know who they are!

Charming the locals after a dinner out with friends. She earned a lollipop from the owner of the barber shop. He called her Princess. She flirted right back. Such a heartbreaker, this one!

Reading with Aunt Danielle.

School Daze

As I write this, I can barely keep my eyes open. I feel more exhausted (mentally, physically, emotionally) than I ever remember feeling even in those first few newborn weeks of 3 a.m. feedings. But, folks, I have survived my first week of school! Sure, it was only two days, but still, I made it! I got all my kids to lunch on time and home on the right bus, so I'm calling it a win.

The night before the big day, I was a nervous wreck, I don't mind admitting it. I have major fear of the unknown. I had already come inches away from bursting into tears multiple times throughout our preplanning motivational speaker (he was really motivating, what can I say?) and driving home, I just had to admit to God that I already knew there was no way I could make it through this year on my own and I gave Him the entire year, put it straight into His hands. Then my sweet neighbor Kim met me in the backyard after dark and prayed a blessing over me. And so clothed in grace and my new back-to-school outfit, I took on my first day as a teacher.

Dawn breaks over the school on my first day as a teacher.

And you know what? Once the kids started streaming through the door, everything kicked into gear. The day passed by in a blur, and before I knew it the kids were on the bus and I was left wondering what just happened. There were definitely things I was disappointed about, things I wanted to do better, problems I hadn't anticipated. Like, why did every kid need to go to the bathroom 12 times? It seemed like the moment one child asked to go, suddenly everyone else decided it sounded like a good idea and they wanted in, too. And we took multiple bathroom breaks a day, folks. It's not like we hadn't  stopped by three times already! Fortunately, I am surrounded by good people, and one of my colleagues (the teacher whose room I inherited, actually) gave me a solution that worked like a charm the next day. And my sweet first grade team checked in with me constantly to make sure I was still alive, asking if I needed anything. I could not ask for better support.

And Friday turned out to be even better than Thursday. I got more done. I felt more on top of things. I knew who to keep an eye on and what to anticipate from my 23 students. I'm hoping each day gets even better, easier, more fulfilling. It's funny, reading all the new teacher literature that people have put into my hands, it seems like first year teachers are always shiny with hope and optimism and enthusiasm. I don't feel shiny (unless it's from the sheen of nervous sweat coating my forehead). I'm just trying to keep my head above water. It reminds me of the times people would tell me to "enjoy every minute" of those sleepless, anxiety-filled newborn days. I wasn't enjoying them - I was merely surviving them. Still, I know I'll look back at these first weeks of teaching and chuckle at how crazy and overwhelmed I felt. At least, that's what I'm hoping will happen!

Anyway, I just wanted to check in and let you know that I survived. So many of you have sent your sweet encouragements and they are so appreciated. We're all still adjusting to our new lives (Violet ran a fever this weekend after just two weeks in daycare, my brain wakes me up at 5 a.m. and won't turn off, Matt is probably wondering what happened to his wife and why was she replaced by this scatter-brained crazy woman) but we are getting there together.

And now, allow me to take you on a quick tour of my classroom! Enjoy (while I go pass out in bed at the deliriously late hour of 9:30 p.m.)

Pretty much what I walked into the first day (I put up the first bulletin board before I remembered to take the "before" picture).

After Matt took two days off work and put up my boards, alphabet, word wall, and arranged the desks. He loves me! He really loves me!

Our specials schedule.

Calendar!

Mrs. Loughman's classroom!

So I've started dabbling in Pinterest, a place where you can "pin" things you like - pictures, quotes, ideas, inspirations, whatnots - to various boards. Basically, it's a place to keep all your online stuff together. Then you can look at other people's boards and get inspired and "repin" to your boards. You can follow people you admire or envy. It's actually pretty cool. But people get seriously obsessed over there. And talk about the black hole of time wasters... and I don't have that much time to begin with.

Anyway, I'm dabbling. There are a couple things I've seen that I've earmarked to remind myself when it comes time to plan for nursery number two (NOT hinting at anything!) or decorate for Christmas. And I've stumbled across a couple cool DIY projects that I wish I could try my hand at.

One of them was this piece of artwork made with puff paint:

via virginiaandcharlie.blogspot.com

I mean, it's just canvas and puff paint! So the other day I was in Michael's getting some school supplies and on a whim picked up a little tube of puff paint. I dug up an old, empty canvas and...

The pattern isn't as pretty (I should have stuck to smaller swirls), and next time I won't sketch it out with pencil first, because the paint didn't quite cover up the lines in every place. But over all, I give myself a B-minus in execution and an A-plus in spontaneity and gumption. I will definitely be trying my hand at another one of these. A trio of smaller, side by side canvases might look pretty... Or perhaps the pearly white puff paint on a background of dark blue... We shall see. I do enjoy a good, low-risk, cheapo DIY project!

Something Sweet

What are little girls made of?

Sugar and spice and cupcake frosting.

One Year Ago

Friday was our first official day of pre-planning. Of course, as a new teacher, I've been into the school for the entire week leading up to this day, trying to get the room ready and attending orientation meetings. But Friday was the official day.

As I reflected back over the day, I remembered what it was like just one year ago on the first day of pre-planning. It was Violet's first day at daycare and I was freaking out. I can recall sitting in the cafeteria, surrounded by people I had only just met for the first time, trying to pay attention to our principal as he mapped out various new policies and strategies, most of which was going straight over my head. I was desperately missing my baby girl, hoping she was okay. At one point, Amy slipped out with her cell phone and returns to scrawl a note to me that read "Just called daycare, Violet is doing great, just finished a bottle..." It was an overwhelming day and I couldn't wait to get out of there.

And now, a year later, some things were so different and some were still the same. I wasn't as overwhelmed. I recognized the faces. The school lingo made more sense. I worried about my sweet girl but I trusted she was in good hands. I didn't need to call daycare to check in. Sure, I felt harried and under pressure to get my room ready, plans written, open house folders stuffed... But I am so thankful I had last year to ease into my role as a working mom. I am so glad I could mentally prepare for what Friday would look like and how it would feel. This is the way my path was meant to go. And it feels good knowing that.

After lunch on Sunday with my dear friend Tatum, we were talking about our past teachers. He couldn't recall having strong feelings either way about his first grade teacher, but he vividly remembered his second grade teacher. What made the difference? "My second grade teacher was warm and kind and I could really tell that she cared about me," he said. And for the first time, I stopped worrying about how I would make sure my kids learned their stuff and made the grades and succeeded so I would look good as a teacher. I realized that maybe it's just as important for them to know I care about them.

So You Think You Can Dance

Summer Review

One of my most favorite things in the world is making and crossing off to-do lists.

But as the summer comes to a close, I thought I'd make an I-did list, just to remind myself what a wonderful season it was.

• Took Violet to the beach for the first time.

• Bought a new car.

• Drove to Ohio for a family reunion.

• Went to two weddings.

• Introduced Violet to the zoo.

• Graduated Violet to the big kids' table.

• Turned the sunroom into a new playroom.

• Indulged Violet's love of water.

Yeah, we had a pretty great summer!

Are You Ready For Some Football?

Don't tell her I accidentally left the tag on...

Seriously, how cute is she?!

We're Number One!

Equal Opportunity

Warning: if you are a woman, a wife, and most of all a mother of young children, the following post is going to make you want to slap your computer screen in disbelief. Don't say I didn't warn ya!

Time magazine ran a fascinating cover story recently called "Chore Wars" about the perceived inequality between husbands' and wives' workloads. You can read some of the article here, and I highly recommend that you do.

Many women I know, both those that work and those that stay home to run the household, believe that we (for I will admit that I am one of them) end up doing far more work than our husbands. Come August, not only will I be putting in a full nine-plus hour workday (with barely a 20  minute lunch, mind you) with kids, but then I will come home and make sure Violet gets fed, bathed and put to bed, at which point I'll straighten up the house, lock it up, and only then sit down to presumably dive into more work (lesson planning, grading) before I can even contemplate any leisure activities (ie: passing out in front of the tv). All this will be accomplished on far less than the recommended eight hours of sleep we all need to function as rational human beings. On top of this daily grind, I am primarily responsible for grocery shopping, knowing what to shop for, knowing when we're running out of necessities, doing the household's laundry, keeping track of doctor/dentist appointments. I run the dishwasher. I take out the trash. I plan and cook meals.

I concede that I do not do yard work. I do not manage our finances. Or deal with car problems. Or household maintenance issues.

And I will also say that my husband has lent a helping hand daily at Violet's meal, bath and bedtime for a long time now.

So why is it that we (I) still feel like women bear the larger burden? Get this: after doing the math, working women with children under 18 apparently only do 20 minutes more paid and unpaid work than their husbands. What? Only 20 minutes more? I have a hard time believing it, but there are the numbers!

In the article mentioned above, some interesting arguments are made. One reason for the sense of inequality comes, as the author Ruth Davis Konigsberg points out, because

Time diaries don’t take into account the stress women feel from being household managers, keeping that precisely calibrated family schedule in their heads at all times or knowing what’s for dinner, what ingredients are required and their exact location in the refrigerator.

Can you ladies relate? Another reason mentioned in the article is that women are more likely to combine leisure activities with child care, whereas men keep them strictly separate. Husband going golfing for four hours? He's not likely to drag along the baby. But mom going shopping with pals? Chances are the stroller is being trailed along as well.

“The obvious cost of this leisure deficit,” Ms. Konigsberg writes, “is that women have less opportunity to relax in a way that recharges their batteries.”

So there you have it. We're doing equal work, but it still shakes out to feel unbalanced. Regardless, it's a good point for me to remember next time I feel like I'm doing everything around here. Apparently I'm not, it just feels that way sometimes.